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donna frankland (uk)

ot. i dont know how to write this

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Donna,

 

I am new to these boards, and I don't even know you, but honey, I feel your pain. I have had clinical depression and anxiety my whole life and I know what it is like. And it should help you to see so many other people on this board admitting their problems with depression as well.

 

Depression is NOT something to be ashamed of. And by admitting it you are on the road to recovery.

 

There are many ways of treating it, meds, therapy, holistic, faith and a few I am sure I am forgetting about. You just need to continue to find what works best for you.

 

I also agree with Miztiki on the faith thing. She said she knew you were not Christian, and neither am I. I did not turn to the bible (not putting ANYONE who does down) but found my own faith and worked hard on it and it helped me A LOT! (I also take meds, but finding your own faith and believing in something can really help as well)

 

I also want to say for myself, and I would think I speak for everyone who has posted here, if you ever, ever, ever... need someone to talk to, find one of us online, support from friends and family is imperative!

 

Hang in there!

Tonya

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Hey Donna,

 

I too struggle with depression. You've gotten a lot of good advice here. I'm glad you posted---not because you "came clean", but for something far more important and meaningful---you reached out and found welcoming arms.

 

Feel better, OK?

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Sometimes I think that anyone who s not depressed today is not paying attention.

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What Claire said is true, and something to watch for. Medication doesn't work for everyone, and frequently there's a period of trial and error to find one that will work. I went thru 4 different meds before I got to the one that made the difference.

 

What I think we're all saying is keep going! Try counseling, if that works, wonderful. If not, or not as well as you'd like, try adding medication. I don't know how it is in the UK, but here, a lot if not all psychiatrists won't prescribe for you if you aren't doing some kind of therapy.

 

See if you can get a referral to a pyschiatrist - a medical dr. who specializes in problems of mood, etc. I wish I'd gone to one years before than I did, I suspect I'd have found the right drug earlier.

 

What ever you do to help yourself with this, know we all care, you did find a lot of open arms and hearts here, and whatever we can do to support you, we will. If you want to email me privately, please do. I've been around the block with this, it runs in my family, I'm married to a depressive, I've got all the qualifications!

 

Please stick around, let us give you our support, and keep sharing stories of your pooches.

 

Ruth

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Wow, I'm surprized to see how many people have dealt with/are dealing with depression. It's a little comforting to know that it's not as strange as you (the sufferer) might think.

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Hang in there, Donna. I'm sorry you've been having a rough time and I hope it eases up for you soon. Just as an FYI, my sis had a pretty major postpartum depression after her twins. Since she was nursing, she was pretty limited on what drugs she could take, so she went with nutritional supplements instead. She said that SAM-e made a huge difference (I think she was taking the 400 mg size, not sure how often.) She also said that omega-3 fatty acids made her feel better. Maybe you can see if the doc or nurse can advise you about that, in the hope of avoiding medications? I'm sure, like medication, it doesn't work with everyone, but perhaps it would help a little, if your medical advisors say it's okay (here it's over the counter, not sure about there.) Anyway, just a thought...

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Donna,

 

Please don't let a thing like the guilt you are feeling over "a lil white lie" get you down. You are comfortable from where Brighid came from and couldn't ask for a better match. Enough said about that. No need for an apology in my book.

 

As far as the depression goes, I truly hope things look up for you soon. I too have suffered for a long time w/ depression/anxiety but have always been too ashamed to get help. I tried once through a counselor but that turned out to be a disaster. My faith in God also is what has helped me the most, but I've also found that now that I have the anxiety part under control w/ meds, the depressive bouts are fewer and far between.

 

Believe it when I say this (and no this is not being sympathetic) but you bring smiles to our faces w/ your posts about all the good things that come about w/ you and the doggies.

 

Keep the positive thoughts in mind...it truly does help the depression even if it doesn't seem like it.

 

Even though "the board" doesn't feel that you owe an apology, it took alot for you to write your honest thoughts out. For that part alone, that just shows how goodhearted a person you really are.

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Donna, I'm adding my ((((((((hugs))))))) I hope you find the right course to get you back on track, whatever that may be. If you ever need to talk...feel free to email me. I'll be happy to 'listen'.

I can only echo what so many others have said...you're part of a family and family sticks by you, through thick & thin.

There's a Chinese proverb that says "Even the longest journey starts with the first step".

So take it one step at a time, my friend. You've already taken the first one.

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Donna,

 

Hugs to you sweetie. I know exactly what you are going through. I suffer with depression/anxiety too, brought on by physical endocrine problems. My health is something I fight for every day. My meds helped in one way but hurt in others and although I'm sure there are more out there to try, I got tired of the different side effects so I'm not on any right now. The moods wax and wan. Having spiritual faith has helped me get up and dust myself off more than once when I've thought I was too tired and confused and in pain to go on. I go from speaking my mind to completely avoiding people in general and for months on end.

 

I respect and admire you for facing this hard stuff head on. I've always known you here as a gentle and loving person. It took some guts for you to post this thread but for sure on my part, no apology is necessary.

 

Lots and lots of love,

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Donna,

I pray that things work out well for you.

personally the fact that you felt the need to apoligize for such a small transgression only gains you more respect in my book.

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Donna,

I want to second what Ruth said. I have a dear friend who suffers from depression to the point of attempted suicide and self-admittance to a psychiatric hospital. He had to go through 3 or 4 medications to find one that worked well for him (in all aspects of his life, mental and physical). Today he's healthy, happy, married to the love of his life and with two beautiful children. So be sure to explore all suitable avenues of treatment, and MOST IMPORTANT don't be afraid to be your own best advocate (much as Nancy was her own by standing up to her doctor for what she knew she needed).

 

You have our support, and I'm keeping you in my prayers.

 

J.

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oh my!

you guys are so wonderful! i dont know how to express my thanks to you all!

it is a real eye opener to see just how many people are affected by this horrible thing.

i have told my friends at work that i am dealing with this and more than a third of them have told me that they are also dealing with depression of one form or another. one of them, someone who i just chat to but respect hugely has invited me to go to his reiki healing group on friday. a little light flickered in my head as it dawned on me that i used to do reiki (not fully trained yet) and stopped for no particular reason about four years ago, i have (had) completely shut down spiritually and it has taken me to now to realise it, no wonder i feel empty!

as for the meds, the dr didnt even mention them just told me to go see the nurse the next day, she didnt want to start with meds (i went to the dr last week as the weekend before is when it all finally hit and i could deny no longer) perhaps she will discuss it more next week?

i will try to remain on the boards as usual, i may be a little infrequent as i appear to be needing about 28 hours of sleep a day at the minute!

i'm going to be wet now but.....

I LOVE YOU GUYS!!!

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You dont need to say Thank you, thats what friends are for

Ah wow reiki is wonderful..... please dont persecute me but I'm Wiccan - my faith helped me hugely. I too stopped practicing my religion/spirituality for whatever reason and it was soon after that the depression set in really badly, I'm now very spiritual and the depression is at bay. I hope you go on Friday, I'm sure it'll help a little at least.

Take care

Claire x

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I struggle with depression as well. In fact, that is a big reason we got Rivendell. To keep me busy, keep my mind off things I shouldnt be so concerned with. I nearly died in a car accident a few years ago, and I really feel like God gave me a second chance. I am a Christian as well, I feel maybe you could find comfort in the Bible as well. If you need specific verses, feel free to e-mail. Im always glad to meet someone who is open and willing to discuss what they're goin through.

 

Im sure opening up ont he board and all the support you're getting is great for you to feel a bit better as well. I admire your courage for speaking up. God bless you. :rolleyes:

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Hail and well met from this side of the pond!!!!

 

I was raised Wiccan and I have found it a huge comfort during the most trying times of my life. Not to mention my roommate would sometimes join me in my circle for the sense of peace and relaxation that she always carried away even though she was not Wiccan.

 

Olivia

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Ah wow reiki is wonderful..... please dont persecute me but I'm Wiccan - my faith helped me hugely. I too stopped practicing my religion/spirituality for whatever reason and it was soon after that the depression set in really badly, I'm now very spiritual and the depression is at bay.

Claire x

persecute you honey?? hail and well met!

love

donna

Merry meet, and Merry part, and Merry meet again to both of you!

 

Tonya

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Wow I had no idea there were so many 'crafty folk' here. Merry meet to all of you!!!!

 

Olivia I've never let any one join me in my circle, I've alway been scared of my focus lapsing... but now you've said that I may let my hubby as he's expressed an interest in celebrating Ostara with me this year.

 

Blessed Be

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Cathy was welcome as she was very respectful! My female dog is always there, she seems to understand and is always careful of the candles. My mom says she is my familiar.

 

My husband is Catholic!!!! Made for an interesting wedding as we were married by a non-demoninational person who I allowed to give a little speech about the christian God because my father then performed a hand-fasting ceremony before we were pronounced husband and wife. We then jumped a broom bought just for the occassion with a face of the south wind (when the wind blows from the south, love kisses thee on the mouth) carved in the handle. Lots of questions were asked by Chris's family but they all seemed fine with it though I was a little scared I would be persecuted. Chris has never joined me but he has expressed interest. Maybe I'll bring it up.

 

Olivia

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Your compassion with me when I lost Luke was appreciated, and I know you are for real, and I know depression. Thanks for telling us, and my prayers are with you for accepting whatever help you need to feel good again. Don't let this bit take too much importance. I'm glad you're still with us, and look forward to hearing about the better days to come.

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ahhh that sounds like a lovely ceremony you had. I'd love a hand-fasting ceremony done. I'm not suprised you were scared of being persecuted - I was nervous enough posting it on here :rolleyes: , you never know how people will react and what mis-conceptions (through no fault of their own) they have.

Blessed Be

 

Sorry for hijacking this thread Donna, I'll stop now

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Two of my kids - all three were raised Episcopalian and were acolytes and about everthing else possible - are pagan. The other, like me, is a pantheistic Episcopalian.

 

My eldest has done a number of hand-fastings. Yup, she's a priestess. Also an ordained (send in the money) minister, so she can even sign the wedding certificates.

 

At middle kid's wedding, it was a mix. It was in late April, under the stars, in the state park where they live. His mother and sister made the circle and called the corners. My eldest closed the circle, inviting the gods. The men arrived and were purified with sage smoke by his step-father, his cousin, and his nephew. The women arrived and were purified by me, my daughter (the eldest), and his daughter. At the ceremony, they made vows to each other, then my daughter made vows to his daughter. At the end, my eldest opened the cirlce, letting the gods go but inviting them to the party.

 

It was pot luck in the camp kitchen, eating on picnic tables decorated with my azeleas, and dancing to CDs under the stars.

 

Best wedding I've ever attended! And it has produced my very own granddaughter Elena.

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Donna

So glad you are seeking help with your depression. It is a wide spread issue that can be dealt with easier than most would think. Getting over the "shame of the illness" part is the first step. Seeking help is the best road to health. Don't stop till your feeling better.

 

Please post anytime you feel it might be getting the better of you and we'll try to make you feel better or kick you in the rear to get up and find help.

 

I know it's probably not what you want to hear but exercise is a natural endorphin releaser. Please try to take some walks or work in the garden, it'll make you feel better. Besides, who can?t benefit from a little be of exercise? :rolleyes:

 

As far as medicines, I don't want to suggest that you need them but let me say, if you had another illness (the physical kind instead of a mental kind) would you feel bad for taking meds? If the dr. suggests them, give it a try. No one including you should feel bad about helping themselves in whatever way they can.

Peace to you

Kristen

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